Considering that I am on the brink of 80, I have in the natural course of life experienced losses of loved ones. I did lose both my parents as a young adult ( by the time I was 30 ) as well as grandparents but I was supported by in-laws. I came to Brookes Place as a result of contact during the years I was a mental health counselor in an elementary school . I knew how loss had affected many of the children I encountered during those years. I assumed that when I retired I would the interaction  with the kids. I took the facilitator training as part of my on-going licensure cert requirements. I had not retired and didn’t expect to become actively involved as a volunteer until after I retired. However after trading there was an opportunity to begin facilitating in an adult group with some one I had known through my school experience. By the time I retired a year or so later I was very happy being with the adults and realized the importance of supporting and companioning the adults who were straight with their own grief as well as trying to raise children who were grieving at the same time as they were trying to find their way through their new reality.

At the time I went through training we were invited to attend debriefing the evening we visited a program night. I loved the atmosphere and camaraderie among the facilitators on B night and I still do!! 

It is a joy to see how the group members support one another and how they often express their gratitude to the group for listening and sharing with one another; how they feel it’s a safe place to share details and feelings that are painful and which they may have been shamed for by family/friends; many times group members have expressed how just listening to the others has been helpful. 

Here is response number 2 because I just had a couple of thoughts. After my father died when I was about 24, I honored his memory through gardening for a few years.

I remember a photograph when I was very little in the garden where we had planted carrots and maybe tomatoes. He loved roses and chrysanthemums and I think that inspired me. My mother was quite a seamstress and made most of my clothes as I was growing up. I was quite clearly aware that what I had absorbed was a love of sewing-I could learn techniques anywhere but her love of sewing led me later into needlework of various kinds. I also have fond memories of my father reading Huckleberry Finn to us in the evenings while my mother worked on needlepoint that became a chair I still have.

I hadn’t thought about these things as they might tie into grief until now! Better late than never!!